The Voice of Fear...

 
Again a lapse in posting...not for lack of fear this time though. Just been waaay busy fighting them. Well, most of them anyway.  For the past 10 days or so, I've been conquering some, doing the daily dance/fight with some, and have fallen back to my usual pattern with others and have been absolutely avoiding them.

Before I go into further detail, I thought it was pretty cool to wake up the last few mornings and find that my devotion time was filled with words on fear, and much info on "The Voice of Fear".  Perfect timing. LOVE when that happens!  In  The Word for You Today, I read of some examples of those who had struggles with fear.  Some statements and questions in that reading really stood out to me:

    * Who are you listening to?
    * Who are you going to believe... God or others?
    * Fear causes us to think the worst instead of believing God for the best.
    * Fear and faith are present with us every day, the one you choose will rule your life.
    * God usually doesn't lift us out of the problem, He takes us through it and toughens us up.
    * Stop and remind yourself who's company you are in.
    
All that I read went right along with what I have been experiencing, and was so very helpful.


Who am I listening to?
In the last weeks we have been faced with some trials in our business.  We are blessed with much work and are grateful for that, but have zero help in getting all of the work completed. Our employee who was to return to work with us April 1st, had back surgery and was out until June 1st.  One surgery led to another, and now he may not be able to come back at all.  Many of the subcontractors that we usually have in place are very busy themselves and aren't ready to move from their own projects to help with ours.  It's been stressful and the "voices" have been loud.  With all of the work coming in and the job leads, it's time to expand...but that can be scary...especially when faced with staffing issues. But, to turn down work and to not expand when opportunities are placed before us would not be wise.  Waiting until all is perfect would be nice, but would require no faith at all. So my hubby and I talk, we pray, and we take each new step before us. If we listened to the fears, we would be paralyzed.  Instead we go on bid appointments, we type up proposals, we place ads for new help, we hold interviews, we move forward, do the best we can each day...plugging our ears to the voice of fear, trusting, and praying the whole way. So far we have found 2 great prospects for employees and have leads on some great subs to possibly work with.  We gave our company to God years ago, we ask Him to lead and guide our every step, and want His will in every part of it.  It's going to be ok, we will be fine...and we are believing God for the best.


Stop and remind yourself who's company you are in ~ 
That statement went right along with one of the fears that I conquered this last week.  I was asked to share with a panel of women at a Mom's group I attend. It meant being up on stage...speaking...holding a MICROPHONE...ugh!!!  But, the subject was on our greatest challenges as parents / what got us through / what we would do differently now...and I knew I couldn't NOT do it. With all that we made it through in our family with addiction, strong willed kids, parents that had confused roles, and that were not united... I couldn't sit by and not let all of those dear women know of the huge mistakes we made, and of the amazing lessons learned.  If it meant the possibility of a happier childhood, more peaceful home, a stronger family - I needed to once again face my mega fear and open up.  And... I did it!!  Yay!!!  As usually happens, I was nervous, I had 2 mini melt down moments, but pressed on, did my best to just ride the fear wave and not give up / freeze up, and got through it with many calm moments near the end.  What helped me the most was picturing the Lord right there with me...standing behind me actually, holding onto my shoulders and helping me to be calm and steady. It has worked so well for me in the past, and did this time too.  I hope I can remember that more often. He is with me / us all...such a comforting thought!


Fear and faith are present with us every day, the one you choose will rule your life ~
So, I conquered in one situation, I'm battling and winning in some other areas, but in some areas I am letting fear rule again. You see, these days, I am letting fear win in the area of school.  I have signed up to test out of 5 classes and roughly 16 credits over the summer. And I am SO SCARED!! You might think signing up and enrolling in them was a big step in overcoming my fear...well maybe...sort of. But, I didn't feel I had a choice. To be able to move on to my next step in my college career, I needed to have my Associates degree completed this summer, so have to do it all now. And to increase my marketability and open up more employment doors for me, the sooner the degree the better...so again, it felt like something I had to do, and now.  But that's all I have done. Like I did the last time I had a big competency exam and interview ahead of me...I froze, I became paralyzed, and did nothing, until it was almost too late. BIG time procrastination here! I know, I evaluated all of this before, posted about it, realized I was believing lies and eventually got the work done. But that was just for one class...taking on 5 classes will be a much bigger challenge! So I fear, I avoid, I fret, and do nothing.  And as the statement above reads... I let fear rule my life in this area. But, as I also learned in this blogging journey. If I post about it, I am taking a better look at it.  And when I write about it and share with all of you my plans to overcome...I actually get "unstuck".  So friends, I will be taking at least one step forward next week. I plan to order the required material for at least 2 of my classes. That's a baby step right?? And now I have all of you out there watching and waiting for my report, so I know I will move ahead!


So thank you for coming along with me on this journey. As I just mentioned, it helps me a great deal in overcoming and moving forward.  In closing, I want to share a couple of the verses that were included in my morning devotional reading that were also very helpful for me:

I will never leave you nor forsake you. 

Heb. 13:5

Fear not; stand still, and see the deliverance of the Lord which He will work for you today. 

Ex. 14:13

Do not fret or have anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance...continue to make your wants known to God. And God's peace...which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds.   

Phil 4:6-7

Be strong and courageous, and firm; fear not nor be in terror before them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you; He will not fail you or forsake you. 

 Deut. 31:6